It's been three weeks since radiation finished. Three weeks.
Its mid September and Floriade has started. I can't quite comprehend how quickly this year is whizzing past. I am glad for it though. Grateful, in fact.
This year has been a whirlwind with little time to stop and think. It's been my saving grace. Too much time to dwell and I'd have been a fearful mess. Completely overwhelmed with the gravity of the situation.
I've found myself in a strange limbo land now that the majority of my treatment is complete. Is this the new normal? Or does the new normal commence when my second mastectomy is finished next year?
I'm left wondering how I explain my current status. Do I still have cancer? Am I battling cancer or am I now recovering from cancer?
Hence the state of limbo.
What exactly is the new normal anyway?
My eyelashes and brows are growing back. I have a hair line again. My skin has healed and I'm no longer exhausted. Our routine is falling back into place in the absence of daily hospital visits and I'm finally getting on top of the housework again.
I've gotten through the worst of it.
Maybe the new normal is just getting on with life...with a body that feels different...and the knowledge that cancer may return someday, tucked into the furthermost corner of my mind.
xx Em
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Is there ever such a thing as normal?! If there was, I'd be in trouble ;). What I do know is, is that you're a beautiful person - and that you're pretty damn special. Plus you have impeccable taste in cafes, and boutiques....which is up top in my opinion!
ReplyDeleteThis is definitely an intense situation, but you have been so amazing through it all, Em....you're gorgeous in so many ways. And when I make my way out there...as it is on my bucket list, we'll meet up for a day to speak about for decades!!
.:Marta:.
Thanks my darling friend! xx
DeleteGood luck with it, hope you're definitely into the beaten cancer crew.
ReplyDeleteCheers Emma...I really hope so too!
DeleteOh Em, you really are an inspiration. I think until you yourself are in such a situation or have a close one who is, you really can't imagine the process that the road to recovery holds.
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing such a personal insight. It isn't half enlightening to see you being so optimistic and strong in such a difficult time.
And on the topic of 'normal', I think that is what ever you want it to be!
Keep going!
Emily xx
Thanks Em, your beautiful recipes and photography have been inspiring me lately. xx
DeleteI was looking forward to seeing these pictures of your new hair after you made such a beautiful entrance in the cafe on Sunday. :)
ReplyDeletexx
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