It's been three weeks since radiation finished. Three weeks.
Its mid September and Floriade has started. I can't quite comprehend how quickly this year is whizzing past. I am glad for it though. Grateful, in fact.
This year has been a whirlwind with little time to stop and think. It's been my saving grace. Too much time to dwell and I'd have been a fearful mess. Completely overwhelmed with the gravity of the situation.
I've found myself in a strange limbo land now that the majority of my treatment is complete. Is this the new normal? Or does the new normal commence when my second mastectomy is finished next year?
I'm left wondering how I explain my current status. Do I still have cancer? Am I battling cancer or am I now recovering from cancer?
Hence the state of limbo.
What exactly is the new normal anyway?
My eyelashes and brows are growing back. I have a hair line again. My skin has healed and I'm no longer exhausted. Our routine is falling back into place in the absence of daily hospital visits and I'm finally getting on top of the housework again.
I've gotten through the worst of it.
Maybe the new normal is just getting on with life...with a body that feels different...and the knowledge that cancer may return someday, tucked into the furthermost corner of my mind.
xx Em
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