Let's #changethedate

In the past I've really enjoyed celebrating Australia Day.

I considered it a day to celebrate everything that was wonderful about being Australian, the diversity of our people, places, food, music and lifestyle.

But this year, on this day, I don't feel like celebrating. Instead I feel the need to acknowledge the acute pain that this day holds for our indigenous peoples. This day marks more than two centuries of awful atrocities carried out against Aboriginals and Torres Strait Islanders by generations of white australia. To me, it should rightfully be a day of respectful acknowledgment of their pain.

 

The other reason for not wanting to celebrate is the immense shame and disgust I feel about our government and the Australian public who support its policies.

It revolts me that Australia wilfully commits human rights abuses against refugees, particularly in the offshore detention centres on Manus and Nauru.

It dismays me the how the government not only ignores the epidemic of domestic violence in this country, but has slashed funding to the organisations who support these victims.

It angers me that the government steadfastly refuses to act on climate change and instead, cuts renewable energy funding and directs those funds straight into the pockets of the biggest polluters.

It embarrasses me that our Prime Minister's daily gaffes are farcical at best and completely bloody humiliating and bizarre at worst, who in the world can take Australia seriously anymore? There are days when I have to work really hard at not getting depressed about the failures of our country.

Ultimately, I think I have faith that the population of intelligent, compassionate and innovative Australians will far outnumber both the elitist, self-serving right wing and the ignorant, racist "fuck off we're full" bogans of this land...and eventually, our nation will flourish as a society again.

We do need an Australia Day to mark everything that is brilliant about our country because despite the faults, there is much that is worth celebrating.

I just don't think it should be the date that commemorates the arrival of the First Fleet. Let's #changethedate and make the 26th of January a day to acknowledge the devastation that Indigenous Australians have suffered since white settlement.

xx Em

 

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Anger

 

It's an emotion that doesn't sit comfortably with me. It's an emotion that I'm working through at the moment. It's an emotion that cancer treatment stirs up. Anger about the unjust nature of cancer. Anger about the horrific illness & pain that treatment causes. Anger about the awful loss. Anger about the permanent uncertainty of cancer returning.

 

 

I don't want to let it fester within me. It feels toxic, like some kind of residue from chemo. I don't want this anger to manifest and eat away at me like acid.

I feel guilty that this anger has me losing my patience and yelling at my kids far too much. I feel frustrated that this anger makes me want to close myself off from the world. This anger is exhausting, malevolently bubbling away under the surface, sapping my energy.

 

 

 

I cannot reconcile it with the innate gratitude of being alive.

I have to find a positive outlet to get rid of this anger.

The obvious choice is exercise. I need to push myself to get walking and working out every day. I need those endorphins, I need to improve my health to improve my mood. My homework from counselling this fortnight is to find an appropriate time & place to have a bloody good scream and cry. A little tricky given the distinct lack of time alone but I'll try.

 

 

 

Now that I've acknowledged the anger, it's time to let it go. I refuse to let cancer rob me of joy. I want to thrive, not just survive.

 

xx Em

 

 

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