There's work to do.

"You were sick, but now you're well again, and there's work to do."

― Kurt Vonnegut, Timequake

 

First week post surgery and the healing has well and truly begun. Bruises are fading, all seven incisions have knit back together and my dressings have been removed.

 

 

 

 

It's been a week of trying to pace myself, stay on top of the pain and somehow keep up with our normal routine.

 

Wednesday was very difficult, I woke to the news that another of my Cancer Clique girls had lost her fight and despite knowing that she was nearing the end, the shock took my breath away. To see the life of this gorgeous 31yr old woman being snuffed out by bowel cancer doesn't make sense and never will. Amelia was sweet & funny. A beautiful soul who supported others even when she was struggling with treatment herself. She sent us all home baked gingerbread at Christmas cause that's the kind of lovely friend she was. Generous.

 

 

 

 

I cried for most of Wednesday...I dropped the boys to school, came straight home, curled up in my bed and cried until I fell asleep and that's where I stayed until it was time to do the school run again. There is no rhyme or reason when it comes to cancer. It steals what it wants, when it wants. The ultimate thief with no remorse. I will never get used to the loss of the girls in my support group, no matter how many times it happens, no matter how much it's anticipated.

 

 

Wednesday reminded me to continue to be grateful for my remission and revel in the little things like watching Harry making a birthday card and Jack discovering the world of Lego.

 

 

 

 

I was sick, now I'm well again, and there is work to do. I will not squander my remission by feeling sorry for myself. I will love the living, grieve the dead and flip cancer the bird at any given chance. I will get stuck into life no matter how damned unfair it can be.

 

 

 

 

 

Sleep well sweet Amelia. You were, and always will be, greatly loved.

 

 

xx Em

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