Perspective and Gratitude

 

 

It's been a week since surgery and I'm in a much better frame of mind.

 

Being home in my own safe, comforting space for the last few days has made a big difference. My boys have been lavishing me with such gentle cuddles and Husband has been doing a stellar job taking care of me. My body may still be fragile and sore but my head & heart are in a much better place. Time, rest and nurturing have allowed perspective to creep back in again and with perspective comes gratitude and a deep appreciation for what I do have.

 

I'm grateful that my cancer was picked up relatively early and that my surgeon was able to do nipple sparing mastectomies with immediate reconstructions. I'm very mindful that for a lot of women its not an option. I'm grateful that my surgeon did such a beautiful job reconstructing my breasts so that they look almost normal, even if they feel far from it.

 

I'm grateful for every nurse who took care of me during my time at Calvary. I have a huge amount of respect and admiration for the work that they do. I was never left waiting for pain relief no matter how busy they were. They were always so gentle when administering my Hepron injections or checking my wound and didn't make me feel bad for falling into a teary heap.

 

I'm incredibly grateful for friends in high places who arranged for me to stay in a single room for the duration of my stay this time. I desperately needed the privacy and peace of my own space so that I could mourn my loss. I'm grateful that I had such wonderful people on the ward looking out for me during a time when I was broken and vulnerable and weak. I'm grateful for little things that made a big difference during my stay at Calvary. A decent coffee delivered with a hug from a very dear friend. A view of the Brindabellas at sunset. Hospital food that was surprisingly fresh, healthy and delicious. A Bosom Buddy volunteer who took the time to sit and share her experience and left a beautiful gift bag donated by a local church.

 

I'm grateful for a warm, cosy house to come home to. I appreciate having a Husband who could take a couple of weeks carers leave. He's been incredibly supportive during this recovery and is a rockstar 'Mr Mom'. I'm grateful for the family & friends who haven't given in to compassion fatigue during this drawn out journey. I'm grateful for an incredible online cancer support group that I'm privileged to have just become part of. The timing is serendipitous and the strength and humour that eminates from these amazing women is so uplifting. Being able to talk to others who truly appreciate every aspect of the fight is gold!

 

 

I am grateful for all the emails, comments and messages of support from my online community. For the phone calls, visits, flowers, gifts and cards that have brightened my days from family & friends.

 

I am very much aware of what is good in my life.

Cancer may have stretched my resilience to breaking point, but it can't steal away my gratitude.

 

xx Em

 

 

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