I am really loving Mummy & Jack days.
Yesterday we kicked around at the National Museum for a couple of hours.
Just him and me...wandering about, the Jackman leading the way and me meandering after him. We had lunch in the museum cafe, sharing a burger and toddler conversation while other bemused patrons looked on.
This morning we entertained ourselves with watering cans and the herb garden. Filling up, pouring out, filling up, pouring out. All the time his sweet little voice pouring out of his sweet little mouth and filling the air with words. The words are coming thick and fast these days.
Little sentences, little statements, little requests, little questions.
So independent, so inquisitive, so bloody wonderful it makes me want to cry.
I remember all those endless hours with Harry...just him and me...playing, talking, exploring, being. Two peas in a pod...inseparable.
Jack has had a fraction of that kind of time...always having to share me. Share me with Harry, share me with doctors, nurses and technicians, share me with hospital waiting rooms and specialist appointments. Handing over playtime with Mummy for surgeries, chemotherapy, radiation and recovery.
In some ways I mourn for that lost time with my littlest baby. I have missed a million moments with him that I will never get a chance to reclaim. But in other ways...my Jackman doesn't know any different. He won't even remember the past eight months when he's older. So I will stop resenting the time that cancer has stolen from us and I will focus on making the most of the millions of moments that are coming into being.
xxx Em
Posted with Blogsy
